Towards The End Part Ten

We drove through Aobadouri street to the Sendai International Center in Aoba-ku. We spotted max from the window almost right away when we drove to the parking lot. We ran inside to see him. We could see it from his face that he wasn’t expecting us and that he was really happy to see us. He had no idea that we were coming to see him. I thought it was kind of weirde, since the company had informed me that Max would be there.

He told us that he had stayed the night at school and that he had made new friends there. I remember him telling us about this one boy who was totally amazed that Max could speak so many languages. The next day apparently the shuttle bus had taken him finally home and he had stayed there for two days doing pretty much nothing at all. He had no idea how big the earthquake had been before he had come to the International Center. He had got reception at about 2 p.m., that was about 2 hours before the exchange student company contacted me. He had also heard that the German embassy was getting all the Germans out of Sendai and some other foreigners came to take the same bus. I was thinking that why hadn’t the dorm people taken Max with them? It must have been weird for him to be alone there with people he didn’t know at all.

We went to talk to this old lady who was the one arranging the bus rides from Sendai to Tokyo. I tried to explain to her with my Japanese skills that I had been promised a place on that bus by EF. Max explained to her in German who we were and where we were going, because she obviosly didn’t understand what I was saying. She wanted to see our passports and I said to her that I didn’t have my passport that I had left it at my house. She said to me that with no passport I was not getting on the bus. I started explaining that I still had my Gaijin Card (Japanese ID for foreigners) that wasn’t that enough? She said that she would need my passport. I was freaking out and I didn’t know what was going on anymore. Ayelet asked her if Tsitika, Chayse and Bill could ride the bus too and they handed their passports to her and she arranged everything so they would be able to ride the bus too.

I started crying and kept saying the words ”I can’t go home” all over again. Chayse and Tsitika were trying to comfort me but it didn’t help. One German girl came to ask if I was okay and Tsitika said to her in Japanese that I forgot my passport. I said to Tsitika that the German girl can speak English so why was she speaking Japanese? Chayse started to laugh. The German girl said that surely there must be a way for me to get on the bus, that they weren’t just gonna leave us there.

Ayelet said with a loud voice something about contacting the Finnish embassy. Then one woman stood up and  asked ”Who here was from Finland?”Ayelet pointed at me and the lady knelt in front of me. She asked what was my name in Finnish and I told her. It was really weird to speak Finnish after all that time. Well of course I had been talking with my mother in Finnish but not face to to face. It was kind of hard and I kept mixing some English words in my sentences.

The lady asked me when was the last time I was in contact with the Finnish embassy and I told her that never. I had never actually spoken to them because the company had arranged pretty much everything for me. She told her husband to call the Finnish Embassy right away. He handed me the phone and a lady answered it. I explained to her that they would not let me ride the bus and that I was told that the Finnish embassy and the German embassy had made a deal that I would get on that bus no matter what. 

The lady told me that they are going to send a fax to the German embassy to request that I get on that bus. She told me to call the embassy after a while and gave me the number. I called my mother almost right away to explain to her what had happened and she told me to calm down about it and that the bus was not going to leave without me. If they had promised me a place on that bus they wouldn’t just leave me. I was underage afterall.

I went to talk to the Finnish lady who had helped me before. She told me that her husband was a university teacher in Sendai and they were wondering if they should have left Japan after the first earthquake on Wednesday but they waited too long and the when the earthquake on friday hit they wanted to go home immediately. As soon as they got reception they had called the Finnish embassy that they wanted to return and the embassy informed them about the German embassy bus leaving from the Sendai International center.

We were finally going to go home I thought. We decided to take a picture together so that our parents could see that we were waiting for the busses. Ayelet was going to post it on facebook. I found the Croatian flag, that Domagoj had given me before he left, in my bag so we took the picture with it for the Croatian JEC students to see that we were fine and we missed them. I was so happy that they didn’t have to experience all this.

We all got to talk with Ayano on the phone. As soon as I heard her voice I started crying. She was crying too, I could hear her voice shake. I didn’t want to say goodbye to her. Not like that. I loved Ayano like a sister and I wasn’t going to see her in a very long time. It was devastating, but I had to say my goodbyes to her. I told her that I loved her and that I would miss her very much. We had had plans that when I came back to Japan we would live all together, but now I was too scared to even think about moving back.

We also got a text message from Rika telling us goodbye and telling that she didn’t want us to go either. Chayse let us all write a short message to her with his phone. We were all kind of broken after everything that had happened and we needed to be together. 

This was going to be the last bus ride together.

Towards The End Part Nine

Somebody screamed my name from outside. I went outside to see what was happening and the teacher told me that somebody was calling me. I answered the phone and it was somebody from the exchange student company. The woman said that they had been trying to reach me the whole weekend. She sounded so relieved when se heard my voice. I though it would be hard to communicate since she was talking in Japanese but I did just fine until she asked where I was. With my language skill I could only tell her that I was at our schools dormitory so I gave to phone to one of my teachers and he explained to her the exact location of the place. The teacher handed the phone to me and asked if I wanted to get on that bus which was going to take me and Max safely to Tokyo and I said yes. Ayelet told me to ask her if the others could have taken the bus with me so I handed the phone to Ayelet and she spoke to them. They didn’t know if it was possible for them to go but it was worth the try. We would go there together and see if we could all get on that bus. 

We were in a hurry. I told Ayelet that we had to go first to my house to get my passport since I had left it there. I couldn’t believe how stupid I had been. When I packed all my other important stuff, I didn’t remember to pack my passport which was probably the most important thing I owned. Ayelet said that we couldn’t take the risk of missing the bus if we went to get my passport. I said that I can’t get home if I don’t have my passport, but Chayse interrupted me and said that it would be okay even if I didn’t have my passport. He said that I would be sent home even without it. I calmed down about it.

We packed all of our stuff and started saying goodbye to people. I thought that all had happened too soon. I didn’t know how to react so I just started crying again. I wasn’t ready to leave them all. ”What if my friends can’t get on the bus?” I thought. I was freaking out. Everything was happening too fast. 

I remember hugging Kou-san who had come to visit us and she was crying a lot. I hugged Li, Monkey and Mole too even though we weren’t that good friends. It was really hard to say goodbye to Bai and especially to Zou who I was used to seeing everyday at  school. Zou was one of my best friends and I didn’t want to say goodbye to him, but I had to. Then there was Koshien... I don’t know what happened there but I kind of felt that he was extremely sad that I was leaving. He was looking at me with those sad sad eyes and I just didn’t know what to do. I was lost. I hugged him quickly and he took my bag and escorted me to the car. His sad eyes were still staring at me and felt like I needed to leave quickly so I wouldn’t stay just because of his sad eyes. 

I felt like my heart was breaking so I kept crying the whole time. Once we got in the car I finally calmed down a little bit. We were sitting in the car with Ayelet and Shin on the front and with me, Bill, Chayse and Tsitika in the back. We started to drive away from the dorms but we heard a really weird sound coming from the car. We were too heavy, the car couldn’t take us all. We just drove back to the dorms and asked if we could get another driver to take us the student’s and Ayelet and Shin would lead the way to the place that we were going. 

I got on the front seat of the car and Bill came to say to me that the teacher had said to him that he could sit in the front. I said to him that it was because of me that we were getting out so I would sit in the front. I really just wanted to sit in the front because I was bigger that everybody else and it wouldn’t have been really comfortable to the others to sit with me in the back. Before we left Mou came to say goodbye to us and he wished us luck. I checked the side mirror of the car and looked back to the others that were watching us leave. I was hoping that they all would get home safely from there. I especially hoped that for Zou and Bai. We were just sitting in the car and the tv was on. It kept showing the same commercial over and over again and it was annoying me. I asked the others what was going on with that commercial. Tsitika said that it was probably just telling us to help each other since it was showing people helping others climb the stairs and giving the seat to an elderly. We were wondering around Sendai and this time we could actually see the damage. The city was deserted exactly like in I Am Legend. The Sendai station was empty and covered with something, I didn’t know what it was. It was getting dark and we were almost there.

Towards The End Part Eight

I have to say something before we continue this story. I am seriously thankful for everyone who has read my blog and even more thankful to those who have advertised it. Just a few minutes ago I saw that one girl had posted a link of my blog on her blog with two quotes. I'm really happy to see that people are actually reading this and curious about what happened. I wanted to share my part of the story because this could have been anyones story really, not just mine. This blog has reached 800 views. I know it might not sound like a lot to you, but for me it's way more that I had expected. Thank you.

We had heard at some point that a Nuclear reactor had blown up, and that there was some radiation. We knew nothing more. We didn’t know where it was so we didn’t know how to react to it really. I just remember Chayse telling us to stay inside if it starts to rain outside and it looked like it was going to rain soon. I’m quoting Chayse when I say this but the lack of knowledge about what was going on and where it was happening was scary.

Surprises weren’t over yet. Ayelet visited us again and this time with one of our foreign teacher  named Jaquie, and of course with Shin with whom she had visited us the day before too. We were really happy to see her again so soon and we were happy to see. She came to us with some news from our families again and we were happy to hear that Ayelet had sent our messages to them. At least now they knew that we were just fine. Also Ayelet had brought us some fried chicken and a giant pudding. 

     She told us that the Mos Burger near her house had donated a lot of food to the community and the ramen shop had donated roast pork, since it was going to waste anyways. I thought that it was so awesome from them to do that. Ayelet told us about the people living in the same community with her. They were all sticking together during all those days. They had this huge barbecue where they all got food and company. Also the hotel near Ayelets house had opened it’s bathroom in the bridal section for the people. 

     We were talking about how the earthquake had brought people closer to one another. It was like this moment that everyone came together and shared what they had. There was no reason and no time to be selfish anymore. We had to think about everybody then.

We were talking about all our experiences there and Jaquie told us that she had booked a flight back to Jamaica immediately after the first earthquake that happened on the Wednesday before the day of the big earthquake. Ayelet said that she can’t go back to the US before she knew that her student’s were safe back in their countries. I was really touched by her words. We told Ayelet that we had gotten reception at the roof of the dormitory and at one point it came back. My phone was dead so I had to charge it and I didn’t have credit on it so I couldn’t have called my parents anyways. Ayelet asked me if my mother had skype and I told her that she had so she handed me her iPhone and told me to call her. She wasn’t answering on skype so I just typed her number on the phone and called. My mother didn’t answer to that either. 

Tsitika and Chayse called their parents with their own phones. Their families were so happy to hear from them but I was really worried about mine. Why hadn’t my mother answered her phone? Just moments after one of our Japanese teachers came to the room with my phone in his hand and said that someone was calling me. It was my mother. She had figured out that I had tried to call her and she tried her luck to contact me on my phone. Ayelet started recording my voice as I spoke to my mother in Finnish. I was so glad to hear my mothers voice after all that we had been through. She told me that she had contacted the company that arranged my exchange year and they all had been in touch with the ministry of foreign affairs and with the minister himself. They had been even in contact with the German embassy since Max came through that company too. My mother told me that in few hours Max was going to take a bus from Sendai to Tokyo. She asked me if I wanted to go with him and I said that I wanted to go as soon as possible. We ended our call after she told me that she would contact the company. There we were just sitting all together in the same room. I started crying. People were asking me why was I crying and I said that it was too soon. I wasn’t prepared to leave Japan so soon, even though I really wanted to go home to my family. I was confused, but so was everybody else. I was thrilled about the idea of seeing Max again, but was I supposed to leave all my other friends behind? I didn’t know the answer to any of my questions and I kept crying. Jaquie said that I would ruin my makeup if If kept crying like that, but I told her that my mascara was waterproof. She said that my tears had washed away my makeup anyways. There we were just waiting to hear something from somewhere but nothing was happening. I was thinking about going home, and how things would be after that. The future looked like it was really far away. 

Towards The End Part Seven

Then my host mother came. I was totally prepared to tell her that I wasn’t going anywhere. I was going to tell her that I needed to stay with my friends, my people. I wasn’t going to let her take me away to her home and make me stay there alone. But she was one step ahead of me. She went to talk to one of the teachers and asked him how long could I stay. The teacher said that I could stay as long as I wanted since there was room and food for all of us. I was totally shocked, I didn’t know what to say. I wasn’t expecting that she would let me go. She told me that she had brought some clothes for me and of course my beloved make up as well. I said good bye to her and Karin the dog and I watched as she drove away. I was just so happy that she had left me there. I spent some awesome time with my friends thanks to her. I think I must thank her for this someday.

At one point one of the Chinese teachers called Jackie from our school came to visit us and we were incredibly to see him. It was a bit embarrassing though because Tsitika was washing my back at the moment. He was one of my favorite teachers at my school. He came to the dormitory by bike. Soon after him one of our Japanese teachers came to visit us. It was kind of weird since I had always thought that he hated me. We even made jokes about him throwing me from wall to wall because I didn’t know a kanji. Of course that never really happened. It was awesome that everybody wanted to come and see that we were okay. I’m not sure if I understood it right, but I think that the teachers were going to have a meeting or something. We told our Chinese teacher to bring us some board games because we were already bored of the card games.

We were just casually laughing and having fun as always. I even taught Chayse how to say "I’m sexy" in Chinese and when Zou came to the room he said that to him and Zou said back to him ”I know you so sexy” with awesome hand gestures. We were all laughing so hard. 

Suddenly one of our teachers bursted into the room and yelled that there was a tsunami coming and that we needed to go somewhere high. We foreigners of course thought that we needed to go up to the second floor. The teacher followed us and yelled ”What are you doing there!? Get down here now!” I grabbed my bag. I wasn’t going to leave it. At first we were just walking fast all together. Our Chinese teacher rode with his bike and waved to us as he passed, but soon after him another one of our Japanese teachers passed by with her bike. Se was holding a rice cooker while she rode her bike. 

I looked in front of me and saw that the Chinese boys were all running. Chayse, Bill and Tsitika ran too. I was a really slow runner so I fell behind, but when my friends saw that they lowered their speed so I could catch up with them. I really thought that the tsunami was going to be there any minute now. 

We got to the boys dormitory and we went to the third floor. We climbed out to the roof from a small, high up window which was really hard for me since I wasn’t as light and small as everybody else. Chayse and Tsitika helped me though so I was fine. Somehow everybody looked terrified. I tried to see if there was a tsunami coming, but I couldn’t see past nakanosakae. I noticed that the boys from the track and field team were there on the roof with us so I had to go and ask if one of my classmates was somewhere there with them. The boys told me that he was at Tokyo. I was so relieved because that meant that he didn’t have to go through all that.

It was really warm again and the sun was brighter than ever. We were just hanging there on the roof and Chayse was making sure we had something on our heads so that we didn’t get a sunstroke. I remembered that I had brought my book with me there so I gave it to Tsitika and she said that she could read it to us. We sat Tsitika in the middle, me on her left and Chayse on her right side. There we sat just the three of us listening to Tsitika tell us the story of Harry Potter and the prisoner of Azkaban. 

At one point we saw everybody doing something with their phones. We realized that they got reception. We were all shocked. We could finally call our parents to tell them that we were safe and sound. I saw Zou talking to his mother. I saw happiness in his eyes, and Bais too. It was a beautiful moment. Everybody got to talk to their families. I didn’t even dare to ask anybody to lend me their phone to call mine since I thought it was more important that the others got to call their families. After a while we realized that there really wasn’t a tsunami coming. Well maybe there was but at least not there. We started walking back to our dormitory. This time we just walked with no hurry at all, it was like we had all the time in the world. We went back to our room, back to playing cards. 

Towards The End Part Six

A surprise came to us that evening. Our HR teacher Ayelet came to see us there at the dormitory. She told us that she had electricity and internet where she lived and she brought some news form our parents. She had told them that we were all alright. She had sent a message to my mother:

”I just got a phone call from a teacher who was at the school and though she is home now, she was there when the worst happened and she confirmed everyone was ok.She said Ifi left school safely with her host family.”

I was so relieved after I heard that. I wrote an email for her to pass along to my parents, for them to know that I was fine and safe it went something like this: 

”Hi mom, everything is alright. I’m alive and we are having fun. We are at the school dormitory and it’s safe here. Everything is ok and I miss you.” 

Tsitika also wrote a message to her family: 

"Hi mama, hi dada! I love you so much and I miss you, It's been a little bit of an adventure but I am OK and I am with friends. I am well and please don't worry too much and please try to get some sleep. I am not going to die because I am not in immediate danger."

Chayses message went like this: 

”Hey I'm fine. It's just like urban camping! I love u and can't wait to get home. Just relax, don't worry and get some sleep!”

We also took some photos to show our parents that we had no injuries and that we were having fun. 

Ayelet told us that during the earthquake she had been skyping with her brother on her iPhone and that her brother saw what was happening right then. 

It was time for dinner, we took turns because there weren’t enough plates and chopsticks for everyone to eat at the same time. We got some rice and soup to eat. It really felt nice to eat some warm normal food. 

I had been eating cookies and lollipops from disneyland for the past 2 days so it was just what I needed then. Also I have to mention about the cold 10 minute rice that we had and the cold curry. Plus we had some Calorie Mate cookie bars that we called ”dog shit”.

That evening brought us another surprise. The school principal came to visit us also. We had never actually met him, but we had heard a great deal about him. We had actually made a private joke about him. Every time a helicopter flew near us we said that it was the principal. Also there was a joke about him going to places with his jet bag. 

I’m not sure if I understood right, but there was a dog staying with us at the dorms, and I think it was the principals dog. 

We also made some jokes about Bai eating that dog if he was too hungry, because he is Chinese and Chinese people eat dogs.

I thought that I couldn’t have been safer then. We got warm food and everybody seemed happy. It was really weird. We played cards at night and we were a bit noisy I guess, but we had so much fun. At that point it seemed like we just were at some camp. We made some really weird jokes too and I can still remember Chayses laugh from the other room when Bai said something really funny in English. We were having the time of our lives in the middle of a crisis. 

We didn’t have much drinking water nor we had any electricity. It would have been nicer to think that we just didn’t have any money and everything was going to be okay soon. But the problem was, we had money and it wasn’t going to end anytime soon. Unfortunately my host mother was going to pick me up and take me home the next day. But I wasn’t gonna go, I wasn’t gonna leave my family again. That night I slept next to Tsitika in the same room with Chayse and Bill. It was hard to fall asleep. The Chinese boys were still talking in the next room. I was happy, but I still was a little bit afraid, so I did something I hadn’t done in a really long time: I prayed. I prayed for my friends and for my self to get home safely. I thought ”God if you exist, now is the time to prove it”.

The next day came and we didn’t sleep much and we woke up early. I was just waiting for my host mother to come. Everybody said to me that I have to say to her that I’m not going with her. We ate breakfast some rice, eggs an muffins. It was actually a lot better that I had originally expected, it was like luxury even after the curry. We had fun again playing cards and everything. Bai said that he had forgotten how to speak Japanese because of the earthquake and when he started to play the accordion to us he made a lot of mistakes and said the same thing had happened with his playing. Bai was really funny, interesting, and quirky. He loved to joke, and he had learned much of his English, it seemed, from watching violent movies in English.

Towards The End Part Five

The dorm lady told me and Tsitika a story about when the previous big earthquake in Japan happened about 30 years ago. She told us that she had been pregnant then and that her daughter whom she was expecting then was pregnant at the moment. It was kind of an odd story, but still somehow fascinating. She also apologized about trying to separate us and explained that in Japan it is not common for girls and boys to be so close. She didn’t mean any harm and we knew it.

We asked the teachers if we could go out for a walk. They said that it was okay to go, but we weren’t supposed to stay out for long. We had about two hours to wonder around Tagajyo. It was the first time any of us out to see the real world after the earthquake. It was really warm outside, it was about 18°C (64°F) and for the first time that weekend I had to take off my sweater. It was really weird that it was so warm outside because on the night that the earthquake happened it had been snowing. 

First we went to the parking lot of the supermarket and we thought if we needed any food. But we were okay, we had plenty of food at the dorms. We continued to walk and we ended up walking to the Nakanosakae station. I could smell the sea from there. It was like the sea had moved to Tagajyo from wherever it was before that. The streets were full of mud, apparently the tsunami had come really close to us. While we were walking I saw two carps lying dead on the ground. I thought then that if a fish that is supposed to bring luck can’t survive in this mess, we didn’t stand a chance. I wanted to go to the other side of the station, but I was told not to go for it was too dangerous. I saw a woman sitting on her porch and she said that we shouldn’t go to the other side. She talked to us a bit. It was really weird because she was speaking to us so casually. That almost never happened with Japanese people.

I didn’t notice it until then, but the streets were completely empty. The sun was burning and bright it hurt my eyes. I really felt like I was in the movie I Am Legend or The Book Of Eli. We continued walking towards our school. We couldn’t get in unfortunately. We walked to family mart and Zou said that he wanted to go and see if Tiger was okay. We were waiting for him and Bai in front of family mart staring at the rice fields filled with water. We saw Zou and Bai walking back. I saw from Zous face that they hadn’t found Tiger. We were still hanging out next to the rice fields and Tsitika was leaning to a fence. Chayse told her to step away from it.

I heard a loud yell from Zou, apparently he had found reception. We all checker our phones, but nothing happened. Zous reception disappeared soon too, before he could call anybody. I suddenly remembered that my previous host family lived nearby so I told everyone that we must go see if they were all alright. We walked there and I remembered all the times I had walked home from school. Next to the park near my house there was a sign that said ”人生が変わる” which in Japanese means ”life will change”. In my mind I laughed ”oh really?”. I rang the doorbell and they all came outside to see us. I was so happy that they were all okay. We didn’t stay for long, it was fine just to see their happy faces. I didn’t know that was the last time I was going to see them. We started to head back as the sun was setting. Soon it would be night. 

Towards The End Part Four

After I had seen my friends I got in the car. My host mother asked me if I wanted to follow them, I told her that I was happy to have seen their faces and that the next day I would walk there and visit them. She asked me if I knew the road and I said yes, that I would be fine. She didn’t resist to the idea. 

We went back home. It was already getting dark and my host father had gotten home. He had brought a stove that worked with oil and not with electricity so that we wouldn’t be cold at night. I was watching a movie again at the living room. My host brother was reading a book that was about Finland. He said that it was very interesting and that he had read that in Finland we put small children under the snow to take a nap. I had never heard of such thing so I just laughed. We had cup noodles for dinner and some rice. I was starving, but I didn’t really care because I thought of those who had nothing at all. My host mother told me to sleep in the living room because I wouldn’t be so scared that way. But I told her that I’d rather sleep in my own room and thats what I did. In the morning when I woke up I told my host mother that I want to go see my friends she said ”ok, let’s go”. I took my bag and we drove there. 

When we got to the dormitory there was one Chinese teacher and one Japanese teacher there. They were surprised to see me. My host mother introduced herself to them and asked them if I could stay the night. I was really surprised. I didn’t expect her to let me stay the night there! I was really starting to like her. She said that she would be back tomorrow and then she left.

The teacher took me to the room where my friends were, they came to hug me all. Zou and Bai where there too. I was so happy to be with my family again. Tsitika told me that they tried to separate her from the boys, but somehow they managed to get Tsitika to stay with the boys. Unfortunately they tried to separate us from the boys again because girls and boys were not supposed to be together. I started freaking out, I just couldn’t be separated from my family again. That was when Chayse got really pissed of. He said to the teacher that there was no way they would separate us, that he would not let that happen and that we would stick together no matter what happened. It was the first time I saw Chayse like that. I cried and cried until the teachers finally let us be together. 

We had lots of fun playing cards with the Chinese students. I was so happy to be with all my friends again. I was really worried about Zou because he was really looking forward to the spring vacation when he was supposed to go and see his family in China. I felt really sorry for him. He was one of my best friends there in Japan and we always hung out together in school. 

It was warm outside, me and Tsitika we just dancing and singing until one of the teachers came to tell us to be quiet. We were restless. I took all my things to the dorm room. There were two bedrooms. The teachers had told Tsitika to sleep in the other room, but she had slept in the same room with the boys. For some reasons we changed rooms almost immediately. We became roommates with Zou and Bai. They said that it was nicer to be with us since their previous roommates spoke Cantonese and they couldn’t understand a word what they were saying so it was annoying. We played a card game called ”badman” and it was really fun. 

I felt like I was at the right place. At some point I really needed to wash my hair after these 3 days. And for some reason at the dorms the toilets and the sinks worked. So that made it possible for us to wash ourselves, well at least our heads. We weren’t supposed to be wasting water. The boys said to us not to was our hairs because we would get headaches from the cold water, but we didn’t really care. We are girls after all. We continued playing cards for hours. We were really loud and the teachers came to the room countless of times to tell us to shut up. It was like we forgot about the earthquake. But the earthquakes kept coming. It wasn’t easy. Every time an earthquake hit we all ran to the door. Zou was the first to stand up always, Bill was the last. These earthquakes kept coming every once in a while. It was terrifying sometimes, but sometimes we didn’t even bother to stand up. It was like if the roof is supposed to fall on us it’s gonna fall on us no biggie.